


Ordinary Cats

by cognomen



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Cats, Drabble, Gen, I have no excuse for this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-22
Updated: 2014-06-22
Packaged: 2018-02-05 18:44:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1828369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cognomen/pseuds/cognomen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>“Took you for the dog type,” Tony says, surprised, when Steve hoists the plastic shell of the carrier carefully through the elevator doors.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Within, a pair of luminous green eyes, a face that looks as if it had encountered the business end of a truck, in Stark’s opinion, and so much fur that it’s hard to define the actual shape of the cat apart from ‘round, large, perhaps legless’. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Steve looks vaguely embarrassed - the carrier emits a hoarse sounding rasp that could qualify as a Meow in a horror movie.</i>
</p>
<p>Written for the prompt 'Avengers+Cats - three sentences per avenger', for a three sentence fic challenge. Someone is a cheater.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ordinary Cats

**Steve -**  
“Took you for the dog type,” Tony says, surprised, when Steve hoists the plastic shell of the carrier carefully through the elevator doors.

Within, a pair of luminous green eyes, a face that looks as if it had encountered the business end of a truck, in Stark’s opinion, and so much fur that it’s hard to define the actual shape of the cat apart from ‘round, large, perhaps legless’. 

Steve looks vaguely embarrassed - the carrier emits a hoarse sounding rasp that could qualify as a Meow in a horror movie.

“The hospice got too many complaints from family members,” he says, cautiously, as if Tony was going to tell him to take his cat and shove it. Tony crosses his arms and considers it. “Peggy is really fond of her so I thought...”

“You keep that demon out of the labs,” Tony relents, without any further challenge.

**Tony -**  
It’s just the beginning of his bad luck, however. The tower is still under repairs, and there are still sections where the siding is open, torn, removed. They put the scaffolding back up to begin repairs, and Tony breathes a little easier when the windows are back in.

It’s then when things start disappearing. 

Rather, not disappearing but moving, unexpectedly. Falling, occasionally. He’s on the verge of blaming Captain Americat for unleashing a fluffy hellion when he discovers an entire line of pressure solvent experiments overturned onto the floor (for getting those really stubborn bug smears off of his HUD), when he sees it.

**Pepper -**

“Tony, they aren’t multiplying,” Pepper tells him, the sleek black bundle held gently in her arms. 

The cat looks smug - he’d feel smug too, to be that close to Pepper’s chest at the moment, but the cat looks positively shit eating, a solid black animal - unlucky! - with yellow eyes that are made for ambush. 

“He probably just got during reconstruction,” she assures him, sliding her fingers beneath the sleek chin, “You won’t even know he’s here.”

 

**Bruce -**

His eyes water if he even thinks about Jailbreak, which means the cat (affectionately named by Tony after ‘Big Balls’ was vetoed by Pepper and Natasha both) adores him. 

Jailbreak is aptly named, because nothing seems able to hold him, and for that Bruce feels a bit of sneezy, puffy, snotty kinship, even if waking with the cat on his chest is nearly a recipe for days of sketchy breathing. 

Despite that, he can’t think of it as a genuine maliciousness on the part of the cat, and Tony always appropriately retrieves the animal, coming down as if to fetch the newspaper every morning and slinging the cat unprotesting over his arm like a tea towel.

“He gets into the labs too,” Tony complains. 

“Have you considered a DNA targeted force field?” Bruce asks, half joking, running his fingers through the sleek black fur even at risk of the red eyes and running nose.

Tony arches his brows, thoughtful, and wanders off with the cat still dangling.

**Clint -**

Everyone is surprised by Clint’s reaction to Jailbreak and Fendi. 

For someone so allied with birds he seems to emit some sort of feline peace forcefield that renders the lounge into neutral enough territory that the spoiled, prissy, aging Fendi (Steve hadn’t had the heart to change her name. Tony delights in calling her ‘Handbag’) and the more adventurous Jailbreak can tolerate each other.

Usually they tolerate each other in piles on top of Clint, making a game of joining him in whatever unlikely perch he finds, and when Tony finds the three of them on top of the lounge refrigerator, with Clint aiming Jailbreak’s front half at a ‘large insect with too many legs to be legal’, he just refills his coffee and leaves.

**Natasha -**

“I need your anti cat forcefield,” she tells Tony, and he looks up from his lab work - only gone uninterrupted since he had perfected the aforementioned technology.

He is surprised, until his eyes land on her - kitted for battle, serious as church on sunday, save for the large patch of Fendi colored fur embedded into the left side of her costume. 

Wisely, he says nothing but, “I’ll have it installed on your closet by the time you get back.”

**Sam-**

“Nice Handbag there, flaps,” Tony greets, when Sam arrives carrying an armful of fluffy cat.

“That’s not her name,” he defends, and it always amuses Tony to see the cat getting along with anyone at all. Secretly, he approves of her dislike of Steve, though he’s not sure he can wholly understand it, he feels a kinship to any animal that occasionally wants to scratch the crap out of Captain America for no perceivable reason.

“It’s her profession,” Tony agrees, “How’d you make her like you, anyway?”

Sam grins, shrugs a little, “I sneak her cheese when Steve’s not looking.”

Tony makes a thoughtful noise, and accepts that the cats are probably a permanent part of Avenger Tower, welcome or not.

**Thor -**

The phone rings, and Tony watches Thor answer it with cautious pokes of his fingers at the technology that to him, was probably pretty quaint and primitive.

“Yes, this is he,” Thor answers, booming, half posing as if the person on the other end could see him. Tony shakes his head.

The conversation continues to rise in pitch in pleasured excitement, and Tony loses track of it, and time entirely. It must be hours later when Thor returns, and the size of the puppy in his hands - Tony thinks it’s a puppy, from the outsized head and paws, anyway - is gigantic.

“No, get it out of here,” Tony says, envisioning early mornings and stepping on puppy pads, pee stains, chewed nine hundred dollar shoes.

“But the pet shop owner finally found me one that will be big enough to ride!”

**Author's Note:**

> -'Jailbreak' is an AC/DC song title  
> -Fendi is a designer name. Hence the reference, 'Handbag'  
> -This is all Val's fault.


End file.
